Is the “Guilty Party” In A Divorce Free To Remarry?
God’s law concerning divorcee and remarriage is stated in Matthew 19:9 “And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.” (see also Matthew 5:32; Luke 16:18; Romans 7:1-3). In a divorce according to Matthew 19:9, there is what we would call an “innocent party” and a “guilty party.” The innocent party did not commit the fornication whereas the guilty party did. The Lord allows the innocent party to divorce (put away) the guilty party because of their fornication. The innocent party is then free to marry, another without being guilty of adultery (providing they marry someone who also has a right to marry). Some contend that since the innocent party is free to remarry then the guilty party must also be free. However, such a conclusion is not warranted nor authorized by the scriptures.
The “guilty part” that was “put away” because of their fornication has forfeited his/her right to form another marriage union. There are some sins that, once committed, carry with them continuing consequences. For example, one may get drunk and commit murder. That person can certainly obtain forgiveness of the sin of drunkenness and taking another’s life, but nothing he can do will bring back the person he killed. He must live the rest of his life with the consequences of his actions. One can so violate God’s marriage law that God withholds from that individual the right to form another marriage and he/she, therefore, must remain unmarried the rest of his/her life. The principle of having to bear the consequences of one’s action is seen regarding Esau in Hebrews 12:16-17 “that no one is sexually immoral or unholy like Esau, who sold his birthright for a single meal. 17 For you know that afterward, when he desired to inherit the blessing, he was rejected, for he found no chance to repent, though he sought it with tears.” Once he sold his birthright there was no way to get it back. He had forfeited his right to it.
The Lord speaks of those who must remain celibate because of an unscriptural divorce in Matthew 19:10-12. There are those who have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven’s sake. That is, some remain unmarried out of necessity because they desire to obey God and be able to enjoy heaven when this life is over. Absolutely nothing in this life is worth losing your soul in hell for all eternity — not even marriage. “ For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and forfeits his soul? Or what shall a man give in return for his soul?” (Matthew 16:26). God’s law is sure!